The T.rue O.fficial T.helemic O.rganization

We Are The Only Bonafide Heirs To Aleister Crowley

Since Aliester Crowley's premature death in November of 1948 A.D. there have been many many claimants to his legacy. Though Crowley was himself an example of the very finest that humanity has to offer, being a Renaissance man as well as one of the kindest and most courteous people to have ever lived, unfortunately the debased condition of mankind in his time meant that he had to work with a pack of the filthiest, most dishonest, lazy, and stupid group of human beings ever assembled. After his death they immediately began to squabble over who had inheritied his legacy and the various factions continue their interminable infighting to this very day.

What these wretches, who are all either drug abusers, sex fiends, crooks, morons, self-righteous posers or all of the above, have managed to create is a vast and ever growing mob of pretend Thelemic Organizations that are always just scams and-or cults and-or just plain ego trips. At best they are a bunch of nice but ineffectual nerds playing fantasy games with each other. Nowhere it seems is there a true bearer of the torch of Sir Aleister Crowley's great and noble legacy.

The condition of mankind today is very little better then it was in Crowley's time, and if it has improved at all it is because of the efforts a very few brave, courageous, and noble people, aided of course by aliens from Outer Space. My own experience is completely illustrative and is the basis upon which I can prove that Frater Beauttochs, otherwise known to the world of men as Supreme Magus of O.T.O.T.O., I.B. Butthead, is the one and only true heir to Sir Aleister Crowley (Bathomat, M°, O.fficial H.ead of the O.rganization).

I was living in 1965 A.D. in a large Canadian city when I over the course of a week lost my job, got dumped by my girlfriend and evicted from her apartment, and was falsely arrested for disturbing the peace. As often happens, it was in jail that I received the first inklings of my almost superhuman destiny. One night, as I tried to ignore the sounds of my cellmates buggering each other and get some sleep, a strange blue light enveloped the entire scene and I discovered that everyone, except it seems I, was completely immobilized in the midst of whatever they had been doing. A strange mettallic grating sound filled the air and the next thing I knew I was being lifted off my bunk and transmateriallizing through the top floor and roof of the jail, dragged up by a glowing golden phosphorescent "rope" of diffused light.

I was being taken, I found out later, into the intergalactic ship of an alien species named the Sirians, after the planet Sirius which they are native to. The Sirians are a highly benevolent species, propagating wisdom and knowledge throughout all of space and time. It is they who are responsible for the existence of the human species and all its progress, limited though that may be. There enemies are the Orions and the Greys (though individual Orions and Greys have been known to see the light and join with the Sirians for the betterment of all space/time) who are responsible for most of human suffering with they're demon emissaries like Jesus, Buddha, Gandhi, and Larry Hagman.

Over the ensuing years I have many meetings with Sirian agents who prepared me and psychically altered me so that I would be able to incorporate the immense spiritual cappacities with which I was being endowed. In 1978 A.D. I was declared ProtoSavior assigned to the human race, and in 1981 A.D. I finally met personally with Sir Aleister who briefed me on my life's mission and acknowledged me as the only true heir to his teaching and the only one permitted to rule upon it's intent and meaning, the only official Teacher of Thelema in the world of mankind.

Since that time I have worked unceasingly for the betterment of all space/time. In 1984 A.D. I formed the exoteric face of the eternal Guardians, that is, the One True Official Thelemic Organization to set everyone straight and to clean out the utterly revolting pigsty created by the work of all of Sir Aliester's "pseudo-heirs" and their minions and toadies.